A funny thing happened to me on the way out of...

[Fergus]

I was having a day off from 'work' and went with my wife to Alresford where she was having her hair done. I drove a little way out of the town parked up and took a river walk, feed the swans and ducks before receiving a text to pick 'er indoors up in the town in 15 mins. I drove back into town whereupon I had a few minutes grace so I parked up and walked around the cemetery and decided to have a quick pee in the public convenience next to the ceme*. 

So I dashed across the road and straight into the open door. Now because I wear no fly joggers I have to pull them down and sometimes my arse might be visible so I headed straight into a cubical. While peeing I'm looking at a box next to the Shanks and it's a minute or so before the penny drops....I'm in the ladies. At this point I hear someone else come in and occupy the next cubical. So it's now a case of planning my 'safe' exit. Up with the joggers, quick flush, open door and with great pace head out into the street. That part went exceedingly well without meeting anyone coming in.

As I reached the pavement someone shouts 'Hey Don'....would you f'in believe it, on the opposite pavement was my son's Mother In Law who lives in Alresford, and who probably knows which door is for which.

I'm not sure what or where she saw me coming from but I suspect I will hear pretty soon.

[inboost]

OMG that's too good!

Great story Fergus - That's going to hang around for the next few holiday gatherings for sure! Best of luck weathering the storm!

[inscription]

Apr 8, 2022 12:34:18 GMT -8 Fergus said:

 'er indoors 

This phrase might be lost on most non-UK readers! God, I loved Minder - but it has to be the Terry McCann era.

[inboost]

Yes, totally over this Yankee's head

I'm not so sure my Wife would take to be called that either

[Fergus]

Minder, Arthur Daley the all embracing car dealer.

I think another quote of George while talking to Dave in the Winchester Club, was ‘I’ve given ‘er indoors a new outlook in life, I’ve had a window fitted in the kitchen’.

[trilo]

For some reason this reminded me when I went to my friend's stag party in 2014. I had no clean boxer shorts on that day so I had to borrow my wife's underwear. 

After we had watched the Argentina - Germany world cup game we went for sauna and I was forced to explain my situation: "Erm... guys, just to let you know in case you wonder..." 

They and my father in law had a good laugh about it when I told the story